Bull by the Horns

You think you got problems? Try being a bulldog with no nuts.

Saturday, May 27, 2006

Head Rest

I'm a keen proponent of items that have dual purposes. Take Dad's face for example. Great for licking (specially when he's done eating) but did you know they're also great ottomans for your chin!

Friday, May 26, 2006

Friends in High Places

Introducing Thomas Peterson.

Alright, alright – I admit it. He’s not quite in a high place… yet. BUT he is running for mayor of Anoka, Minnesota. The way I see it, the more pups in political power, the more likely it is that a dog nation will realized. Therefore, I have agreed to dispatch a battalion of A.R.F. security troops to ensure his safety.

He’s a French Bulldog – a fellow smooshed-face breed who is vehemently against surgical debarkment, relishes both freedom and diversity of belief and has a kick-ass theme song. (click here to listen!)

He also raises credible campaign funds by throwing poker parties. What else brings us dogs together than a good long nighTexastexas hold'’em.

Perhaps, with his political prowess, he can provide universal access to rawhide or convince Starbucks to create more ergonomic frappuccino cups, or help organize a special education program for our mentally challenged cousins.

While I know many of you do not live in Anoka – and thus may not be able vote on your own – there is still time to move there, or at the least, get the word out!

VOTE for Thomas!!

Saturday, May 20, 2006

Yappy Berf Day

You know, it may be the wrinkles... but I only just turned a year old. Still, you'd think that someone with as much knowledge and experience as I have would deserve more than just one lousy cupcake. I know, I know, it's a 'toy' and so it would probably last any 'normal' dog weeks and provide hours and hours of fun. But, c'mon, honestly... its only gonna take 10 minutes to demolish this thing.

I will give you my poker face. Think I'm bluffing?





YEeahh, now THATs what I'm talkin' about. A peanut-butter-turkey cake with yogurt-kibble-carrot topping!! NICE!

Nothing like a check-raise.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Long Beach Bulldog Beauty Contest

There were plenty of beauty queens that requested personal bullyguards (since lots of humans attempt to squeeze their cheeks and rumps) so I got decked out in my security shirt and shades for this year's Bulldog Beauty Contest.

Good thing I had plenty of other security troops to accompany me since there were over 300 bullies in need of protection. Some of our undercover agents disguised themselves as "Starbucks Lattes". I had a the A.R.F. (Armed Revolutionary Forces) "Special Artillery Unit" present in case the humans got too unruly. We also outsourced some muscle from the SoCal Bull's Angels Gang. (Thanks Dudes!)

Over all the day went well and Bunny (Miss Long Beach) was crowned as this year's Bully Queen. Home town advantage I suppose.

Click here to check out the pics of my day.

Monday, May 08, 2006

Injured

Sorry folks for the lack of posts lately, but I've been trying to recouperate from an injury sustained during excessive training. --I've been trying to bulk myself up for next week end's upcoming bulldog contest at longbeach and while lifting some weights (mostly my own) my hip got really sore. I'm not juiced up on any roids but mom has me on some "athelic suppliments"